April Showers

April is a long month in TV land. There's just not much happening, is there, Freaks? It's not quite finale season yet, so none of the shows are having big exciting drama, nothing new is premiering, there's not even any industry news.

It makes it hard to write a TV blog.

I mean... what to say?

I could tell you that I watched Magic City, and while I want most of the clothes and jewelry it features, I do not give a crap about any of the characters. It was described as The Sopranos meets Mad Men and the problem is that it is trying very hard to be just that.

And failing miserably.

But god, it's trying hard. From the we-get-it-it's-Sinatra plot line (and BTW- were the mob bosses gonna let the union guys screw with Frankie's big New Year's Eve concert? Methinks not.), to the extremely gratuitous nudity, to the long melancholy gazes of Jeffery Dean Morgan, everything was just trying so hard. Please don't even get me started on the mobster's wife who seduces the son, because she's trying so hard to act sexy she's probably sweating diamonds.

Honey, real sexy is effortless.

Give me that dress, you don't deserve it. 

I could tell you that I adored the Law and Order parody from Community this week, that I found it to be the sweet spot that show hits when it does meta perfectly- it's weird without trying to be weird, it's paying sincere homage to its source material while making fun of it, and that it used plot developments to choose the perfect material to satire, but....

Do you watch Community?

The ratings would indicate that you don't.

You are a horrible person who is going to kill my favorite show. Are you happy with yourself? 

You might watch New Girl though, which I think you'll agree keeps getting better and better. I am desperately hoping that Nadia the Crazy Russian Model becomes a regular occurrence, because I died laughing at everything she said. I love the guys and the group dynamic, and it's really nice that they've figured out a way to temper Zooey's quirky shit into a likable character.

Because I'll tell you, her iPhone commercial makes me want to take a bat to her adorable face.

Yes, it's fucking raining. You're looking at it.

I could also tell you that I just can not make up my mind about Scandal. I hate the casting for the President, he's smarmy, which is unfortunately making me care less about Olivia's struggle with her feelings for him. You got played by a jackass, honey. You're a smart woman - deal with it. I enjoy the show, I'm just hoping that it ramps up next year and really blows my socks off.

I can tell you that I have the last two weeks of Revenge unwatched on my DVR. Why?

Apparently I didn't miss it as much as I thought.

And that I keep watching Bones despite the fact that it makes me miserable. Seems I can't quite find the line between hopeful and time-wasting.

Ok, well it's never entirely wasted time...

But all of those things seem a little blah, don't they, Freaks?

Where's the TV passion? Where's the fire and brimstone? Where's the vitriol, aimed (with love, mostly) at the shows and networks that need my help?

Should I use it to tell The Office it's time to hang up the employee badge? Tell Cougar Town that while I love it, I also understand why people don't? To tell The Vampire Diaries, once again, to stop having themed school dances before my brain explodes?

Yes, because of course the entire school knows how to jitterbug. Go to hell. 

Meh.

I think I'll just save it for May.

Things I Love/Things I Hate

Thing I Love: 

After the casting of my hero Eddie Izzard as Grandpa and reading this great interview with creator Bryan Fuller, I'm officially pumped for the Munsters reboot, Mockingbird Lane. I'm also excited that NBC has such a buzz-worthy and potentially awesome show on its hands. It feels like they could give fantasy success story Once Upon a Time a little competition, especially if they pair the show with Grimm for a family friendly night of cool supernatural TV. Don't screw this up, NBC.

It's Hogwarts Orange County! 

Thing I Hate: 

Yeah, I won't hold my breath, because they put new sitcom Best Friends Forever on Wednesday night "Happy Hour" (vomit) where this smart, funny, engaging show that features women who are not the ones I want to stab in the face (Yep, talking about you, Whitney) has been buried underneath other, shittier shows. It's a shame. I'd tell you to watch it, but between the terrible name, complete lack of promotion, and banishment to the most shameful "girl's night" of television ever, I don't have much hope of it lasting.

My hell = NBC Wednesday nights.

Thing I Love: 


Fairly Legal has stepped up, and with the addition of witty-banter Ben (Ryan Johnson), has become a more well-rounded, fun and fluffy weekly escape. The brewing love triangle with Kate, Ben and ex-hubby Justin make it feel like a rom-com, it's great to see Lauren become a complete character, and I'm loving the addition (however shortlived it may be) of Tahmoh Penikett - plus, it was amusing to see Helo and Anders in suits.

And again, I can not emphasize this enough - I went to college with the black guy.

Thing I hate: 

Scandal is not The West Wing. I'm not saying it's not a good show; it is and I enjoy it and plan to keep watching, but it has potential I'm not sure it's going to embrace. There are brief glimpses of the show it could be, but I'm not sure that either creator Shonda Rhimes or ABC have the stones to let it. I want more for lead character Olivia Pope (played with vulnerable aplomb by Kerry Washington) than just being heartbroken- I hope that they can allow her to become the well rounded female lead I want her to be - a fiercely smart woman who uses the system she knows to fight for those who need her. I want the show to live into, not shy away from, it's potential intelligence and genuine moral complexity. You can be more than a soap, more than a procedural, Scandal. Smart people like TV too.

Although I see how you could be confused.

Thing I Love: 

Matt Bomer on Glee. Matt Bomer should be on all shows, always. And he should always be singing.

Thing I Hate: 

I had to say goodbye to both Happy Endings and psych until fall. Boo.



So what do you think, Freaks? Any TV tirades you're dying to share? Head to the comments! That's also where you can post your burning questions for the next round of Ask the Freak, coming soon! Or you can email me, or Facebook me, or hit me up on Twitter (@theTVFreak), or text me, or hire an airplane to follow me around with one of those giant banner signs.

Whatevs, it's up to you.

But seriously, bonus points for the airplane.

The Problem in the Bones

If you'd told me years ago when I started watching Bones that the episode that featured the birth of the child of Booth and Brennan would be awful, I'd have laughed until I cried.

I wouldn't have cared- it would be Baby Bones!

Turns out, I would have been wrong.

That was possibly the worst episode of television I've ever seen.

And I'm pissed about it.

Screw you, Hart Hanson. The Brennan-Booth dynamic was what made this show one of the best procedurals on TV, and what inspired legions of dedicated fans. We loved the adorable banter, the romantic tension, the waiting with baited breath to see these two crazy kids get it together. And you screwed it up.

Because you were more scared of a ratings drop than doing justice to the characters and story you'd created.

Truthfully, I think the "Moonlighting curse" is bullshit that demeans the intelligence of the audience anyway, but you do not get to just skip over it and think it won't affect the quality of your show. It makes me insane that I flinch when I hear Booth tell Brennan that he loves her. My brain instantly goes, "Really? Do you? And when did we get to the point where you say that?"

I should be excited when he says that, not confused.

The whole episode was confusing, actually. The opening scene featured a father speaking to his daughter about pooping, and promising her candy and a cat if she would use the toilet. I think this was a horrific attempt at comedy, which also makes me think the writer's room ordered their sense of humor from the back of a cereal box. I am not a fourteen-year-old-boy, writers, although apparently you might be. (Also, side note, Booth: a six-year-old isn't "potty training", a fact which, as a person about to become a father for the second time, I might hope you'd know.)

Of course it was a Daisy episode, with the obscenely annoying and shrill intern flitting around constantly referring to Brennan's lady bits and trying to seduce Sweets in Brennan's office. The Single White Female vibe she gives off might have been amusing for a minute years ago, but it became trying long ago- kill her.

I recognize that TV procedurals take a lot of leeway with the "science" of their evidence collecting, but there are limits to the amount of stupidity you can expect me to swallow, show, and it does not include getting fingerprints from paper using only cocoa powder and then BEING ABLE TO SUCCESSFULLY TAKE A CELL PHONE PICTURE OF THEM THAT WILL BE ADMISSIBLE IN A COURTROOM. 

That's not even an iPhone. 

I'm sorry.

Have I mentioned that I'm pissed?

I didn't even talk about Angela being able to magically recreate the prison shiv that was used in the murder from the bone fractures with a never-before-seen bajillion-dollar piece of equipment, or that she was able to decipher "1/3" and "marg" from the paper, therefore allowing her to find the precise cookbook from which it came, or that some random dude in prison was expected to be knowledgeable enough to turn vinegar into some sort of acid for dissolving a body, because those things make me feel like my brain is bleeding and I've got shit to do in life.

No, no, let's talk about what really matters.

Lets talk about the arrival of Baby Brennan.

I mean, obviously Bones was going to go into labor in the prison. After walking through the middle of a riot unharmed. (A riot which, by the way, looked more like a Three Stooges episode than one led by actually violent criminals and allowed Booth -the federal officer- to also emerge unblemished.) After the brilliant doctor thought she was just experiencing Braxton Hicks contractions (the go-to get out of labor free card on TV).

And then somehow, she didn't have time to drive 30 minutes to a hospital.

This is my number one pet peeve of all time- it does not take twenty minutes from the minute someone starts having contractions until the baby is just shooting out of there. For first time mothers, it's usually closer to 16 hours.

Let me say that again: SIXTEEN HOURS. 

You had time to make it to the hospital, Bones. You had time to make it home, inflate the water bath, and fly your doula in from her hippie commune in Boulder. You did not have to do what you did.

What are you screaming about? I'm the one who had to watch this shit.

Oh, god. The humanity of it. I'm not even sure I can talk about it, Freaks.

You might become homicidal. You might become suicidal. You might question your own sanity, because it is not possible that a previously well-written and engaging show would use a hamfisted Christ metaphor to introduce a new baby.

That is madness.

I can not tell you how right you are.

They got denied from an inn. They had to give birth, just the two of them, in a barn. Well, more of a manger, really. Because of the animals.

I am not making this up.

It happened.

I saw it.

In slow motion.

And then they went home, looking remarkably rested and un-bloody to a surprise party their friends threw together, complete with champagne, which of course Brennan can drink now.

An hour after she gave birth in a manger.

That is just face-meltingly STUPID. 

Picture me, at home on the couch, except Bones made me the Nazi from Raiders of the Lost Ark.

Seriously, show, and I mean this from the bottom of my heart-

Screw you.

I'm done.

Boreanaz, let me know when you get something new to do!

Like This, Watch That, Don't Bother

Oh, my darling Freaks. I'm so sorry it's been so long.

I have no excuse.

Might I make my apologies in the form of overly dramatic TV recommendations and put downs?

Excellent. Let's do this!


If you like: 

Mean Girls

Watch: 

Suburgatory

This show has really slipped under the radar, but manages to be irreverent and really funny every week. Jane Levy's witty and sarcastic deadpan Tessa is the perfect compliment to the fluffy fun cast of characters, and Cheryl Hines is really superb. It's doing well in ABC's comedy block, so I expect it will be back next year, which is good news for fans of this smart, mocking gem. Also, Alicia Silverstone is set to guest star with Jeremy Sisto!

Um...do I know you from somewhere? 

Don't bother with: 

GCB

I was excited for this show, about a reformed mean girl who moves back to her hometown and has to deal with the conniving drama of all the girls she wronged, but it just didn't live up to the potential for me. Don't get me wrong, it's not bad, it's just not as good as I wanted it to be. The ratings have been lackluster as well, so don't expect these bitches to be back for a season two.

Don't worry, sweetie, those boobs will get a new show! 

If you like: 

Revenge

Watch: 

Scandal 

This show premieres tonight on ABC (10/9) and although I've only been able to see part of the pilot, I was totally hooked. It's a great cast, it's an exciting premise for a procedural, and honestly- there's a West Wing super-fast-banter vibe that just makes my heart go pitter-pat. The show is getting good reviews, and promises lots of good soapy drama from creator Shonda Rhimes, so give it a shot tonight if that seems like your thing.

Don't bother with: 

Ringer

Aw, I kinda hate this, because the show has really picked up the pace and thrown lots of twisty, crazy plotlines at me, but the ratings are just not good enough for the CW to justify the price tag. Bye, SMG! We'll always have Sunnydale....

It's a shame, there's much more side boob in the city. 

If you like: 

Dawson's Creek

Watch: 

Don't Trust the B---- in Apartment 23

This show premieres on April 23 on ABC, but I've seen the first few episodes and while I'm not entirely sure I'm sold on the show as a whole, I am completely sold on the awesome James Van Der Beek, playing himself to hilarious effect. If you were a fan of the Creek, you are definitely going to want to check this show out, if for no other reason than to watch him roll his eyes at Paula Cole songs.

Also, the Beek got hot.

Don't bother with: 


Cougar Town

This breaks my heart, Freaks, it really does, because this show built a dedicated fan base last year and had a decent shot of becoming a ratings success this year, but it got screwed by ABC's stupid scheduling and lack of support. Despite Dawson alum Busy Philipps' awesome performance (the best of the whole cast, in my opinion) it won't live to see the fall. I'll miss you, show!

I wonder how I will deal with the pain?

If you like: 

TV shows that should have been movies

Watch: 

Awake or Missing

Awake is really good, but it turns out the complicated plot would have been better suited for a movie - it feels slow and unsustainable. Missing would have been a terrible movie, but at least it would have only been like 90 minutes of Ashley Judd's weird new face delivering awful dialogue and running.

Stop it right now.

Don't bother with: 

Either of them actually, they are both totally cancelled.



Worried about the fate of any of your other favorite shows? Post them in the comments or on the Facebook page, and I'll get you the goods in an upcoming post! 

Ask TV Freak

I am nothing without you, my darling Freaks.

Well, that's not entirely true.

But without you, I am a sad lonely lady who writes a TV blog that nobody reads, and that's like Liz Lemon pathetic.

So thanks for helping me stay at least at Penny Hartz.

Oh, god, I'm going to die alone. 

In order to thank you, I'd like to answer a couple of your most important  easy-to-answer questions!


Since there are so many shows, how do you pick what to watch and talk about? 

This is the constant battle of my life. Right now, I average about 20 hours of TV a week. You know, in addition to a real job, other hobbies, and, like, friends. Occasionally I even need to do laundry. So it's difficult. Really, if I had the time, I'd just watch everything. Alas, I have yet to find a generous and mysterious benefactor who would like to pay me to write this little blog, so I have to pick.

He offered, but I thought there might be strings attached.

It goes a little something like this: I watch what I like, and I talk about what I find interesting.

I hear you yelling bullshit, so I'll explain a little further. It's a combination of factors: my personal tastes, keeping up with what's happening in television, and taking advice from other smart people I know who watch. For example, I really love sitcoms. A lot of people don't, but they tend to be my favorite, so I'm always willing to give one a shot, even if I expect it to be terrible. Most shows honestly only get one shot to impress me unless they are associated with someone whose previous work as a creator, writer, or actor I enjoy, in which case I will try to stick with it for a while. I kept watching Ringer because SMG was Buffy, even though I wasn't nuts about it in the beginning. (Luckily, it has gotten better.)

Unluckily, it is so very, very cancelled. 

I also keep up with lots of other TV blogs and websites, so if there's a general buzz about something, I'll watch. I went back to Revenge even though I was not crazy about the pilot because it was the hot show of the season, and I wanted to see if I had missed something. I had with that show, but not so much with 2 Broke Girls, which I also went back to but found to be just as stupid and unfunny as I'd originally thought.

I try to watch everything at least once, unless I'm positive that I won't like it (American Horror Story) or I have some issue with someone involved (Rob!), and I try to always listen to people who know good TV. It was on the advice of good friends that I ever saw LOST, Alias, Buffy and Bones - some of my favorite shows ever.

Why are cable shows better than network shows? 

I'm going to quantify this question before I answer it- cable dramas are better than network. Network makes better comedy (for the most part- there are exceptions) so I will answer this in the spirit I believe it was asked in- Why does cable have all the great dramas?

Because they can.

Hey, cable- you can do this too.

Really, it all boils down to expectations. Cable shows have much less pressure to produce ratings, therefore they do not have to appeal to as wide of an audience, therefore the creators and writers get more creative control, and can write the show they intend- with less influence from the suits. There's also less pressure from censors and "parent groups" who are offended by everything, and I think there's probably something in the fact that because a successful cable show makes less money than a successful network show, it is possible that cable attracts creatives who care more about the product than the cash. (Not that I want to imply that of everyone on network- but, you know, three CSI's.)

What will we be watching on TV in ten years? 

I don't know that individual shows will look drastically different, so much as the television landscape. In the last ten years there has already been a drastic increase in the number of cable networks that offer original programming, and now internet-based subscription services like Hulu and Netflix are getting into the game -Netflix already outbid everyone for the new episodes of Arrested Development, and is now in talks to take over the cancelled Terra Nova from FOX. I think we're headed in the direction of lots more "channels" making original shows, and it will be interesting to see what sort of impact that has on quality. On one hand, it would create less ratings pressure for network shows, so the ones with less than stellar ratings but a core dedicated audience and critical acclaim could stick around. On the other, maybe an over saturated market dulls the product, you know?

Already drove the market to bulimia. 

Plus, and I mean this - how am I going to watch any more shows?

I do think that at some point there will have to be a switch in the way it all operates though- you're just not going to get people to pay for TV, plus cable, plus the pay cable channels (there's more of those all the time, too!), plus multiple services like Hulu and Netflix.

Hey stupid TV people- I have a DVR at home. The only way I'm ever watching commercials during your programming is if I am watching it for free on your website.

Why do costumed superheroes work in the movies but not on TV?

My theory about this has two parts. First, I think that as superhero movies have gotten better but most importantly bigger, TV can not compete, leaving established superheroes in the hands of Hollywood and TV mostly left to invent their own. I think it is also because modern TV audiences want an aspect of realism in their shows. I think it's easier to suspend your disbelief (i.e., not think that something is silly) in a movie theater, where we're used to doing it, than on the couch at home, when most of what we watch is centered in present-day reality. It's why "superhero" shows like Buffy, Smallville, and Heroes can work - we believe that the fantastical or supernatural can exist in our reality, but not that someone showing up in spandex wouldn't just be mocked on the internet.

Next week on Wonder Woman- How will Diana deal with internet trolls?

Whew! You guys are intense! Let's lighten it up with a few final quickies, shall we?


What is your favorite episode of Alias/West Wing/ Will and Grace?

"Rendezvous", "Two Cathedrals", and "A Chorus Lie", respectively.

What show was the most influential social commentary vehicle on television?

Star Trek. (That's what you were looking for, right, B?)

Is Happy Endings....ending?

Nope. Yay!

(Stay tuned for next week's post about the chances for all your favorite shows!)

Do you watch reality competitions like Top Chef or Project Runway?

I used to watch both, but they got kinda boring for me. I don't mind competition reality (I'm not including shit like The Bachelor), but I just don't have time for it. And I won't ever watch the stuff that is just stupid people vying for attention (The Bachelor).

Where is Michael Vartan now?

Waiting for a job after the cancellation of HawthoRNe, but you can follow him on Twitter: @damoosers. (He mostly talks about hockey.)

Can you recommend things to watch during this sad month while everything is off?

Yep. That is of course, assuming you are already watching all of my current TV faves: Vampire Diaries, Happy Endings, Community, psych, and Castle.



Got more questions? Send them to me via email, Facebook, or Twitter (@theTVFreak)!

Spring TV Preview 2: Cliche Boogaloo

Oh, Freaks. You mean to tell me that there's more TV?

Where will I find the time?

Actually, most of this doesn't look very interesting, so I guess I don't really have to worry about it.

Thanks for being so frequently disappointing, television! You're a pal.


New Spring TV: March and April 


Awake (NBC, Thursday 10/9, March 1)

I've already seen the pilot of this show, which I previewed here, and it's really good. I'll be interested to see if the ratings indicate that NBC will keep it around before I get too invested (hint: they won't), but I'm definitely on board for the beginning, and you should be too.

The NBC's promo department's finest work.

GCB (ABC, Sunday 9/8, March 4) 

Another show I've already previewed here, I'm delighted to add what I expect to be a fun, catty soap to my TV schedule. Maybe it will fill the whole in my heart left by Karen Walker.

Great rack, great shoes, great big glass of vodka... Mom?

Breaking In (FOX, Tuesday 9:30/8:30, March 6) 

Hey, speaking of Karen Walker! The unequaled Megan Mullally continues her sitcom tour by joining the Christian Slater-helmed sitcom, which was bizarrely cancelled and then un-cancelled last year. This show wasn't great to begin with, but it had some potential, so I'm hoping the tweaks they've made, in addition to the brilliance of the former Ms. Walker, will make it the show it could be.

Missing (ABC, Thursday 8/7, March 15) 

Ashley Judd found a TV series that is exactly like every movie she's ever done: lots of screaming and running as a former CIA agent looking for her missing son. Whoo.

Also, what did you do to your face?

Bent (NBC, Wednesday 9/8, March 21) 

I just can not decide how I feel about Amanda Peet. Sometimes I think I like her, sometimes she makes me completely insane. I'm giving this show a shot, but I do not have high hopes based on what I've seen so far. But hey, if it manages to not be a cliche-riddled pandering mess then I'll be the first one to step up and admit it.

The second he calls her outfit a "lesbian pantsuit", I'm done.

Girls (HBO, Sunday 10:30/9:30, April 15) 

This show, about 20-something girls in NYC, has a vibe that confuses me. Is it a genuine coming of age piece about women struggling through life in a way I will relate to, or is it a bunch of hipster bullshit about finding yourself while daddy foots the bill? Either way, it's HBO, and since Daddy isn't footing my cable bill, I won't be finding out.

Sex in the Brooklyn? 

Veep (HBO, Sunday 10/9, April 22) 

Julia Louis-Dreyfus stars as the Vice President in this irreverent, "scripted but shot in an improvisational style" sitcom, also starring Anna Chlumsky and Tony Hale. Anything about that sentence sound bad? Nope. I smell Emmy!

No, you're supposed to practice looking surprised when they call your name...

Returning Shows: 

So what about your returning faves? Well Community is back March 15, Fairly Legal and In Plain Sight on March 16, Mad Men on March 25, Game of Thrones and The Killing on April 1, Bones on April 2, and Nurse Jackie, The Borgais, and The Big C all return on April 8.

Every time you don't watch this show, a Whitney gets her wings. 

So that's all the new goodness coming your way, Freaks. What do you think, anything you're really excited about? Head to the comments!

I'm also starting a new "Ask the Freak" series, so if you need my particular brand of TV-related insight and snark, send me your questions on Facebook, Twitter, or by email (thetvfreak@gmail.com). Specific or general, smart or silly, new shows or old- I promise to answer all of the ones I like.

Things I Love/Things I Hate

Hello, Freaks. With all the craziness of February sweeps, I've been a TV-watching...well...freak.

There's been lots and lots of good stuff-

And a little bit of terrible.

Thing I Love: 

Revenge.

This show kicks ass. 

Thing I Hate: 

The ratings for Ringer have tanked. Like, really, really tanked- even for the CW. I don't think it's going to make it to next season, and it's really a shame, because it's gotten so much better. I'm not going to lie, I was almost ready to give up on this show. I wanted to watch because I was glad to see SMG back on TV, but the show felt forced and plodding, and I was just having an impossible time getting into it. The writers seem to have noticed, and the last few episodes have been much more faced paced, twisty and exciting.

Not that it matters, because no one is watching, so it's totally getting cancelled.

Poor SMG.

The ratings for the first episode of Cougar Town were also terrible, which makes me very, very depressed. As I wrote earlier in the week, this show is awesome and you and everyone you know should be watching it. Help me out, Freaks, I don't want to lose anymore shows!

That I like.

Thing I Love:

Pilot season for Fall of 2012 is shaping up to be very interesting, my dear Freaks. I mean, sure, as I talked about last week, it's all retreads and reboots, but at least there are a lot of people I really like getting into pilots! If you follow me on Facebook you already know that Zachary Levi will be starring in the FOX pilot Let It Go, which is super exciting until you realize that it's written by DJ Nash, who also wrote the terrible, terrible sitcoms Traffic Light and 'Til Death.

One of the many reasons I don't trust anyone named DJ. 

Terry O'Quinn, who you know I love if you read this regularly, is signed on for ABC's 666 Park Ave., and Jonny Lee Miller (Hackers!) is going to be the new Sherlock Holmes over on CBS. Man, I just have a feeling that show is going to be super-lame. Ryan Philippe will also be joining the network with the cop drama Golden Boy.

Is that "golden" like "aryan"? 

Kristin Kreuk will be the CW's Beauty on their Beauty and the Beast remake, while the adorable Becky Newton (Ugly Betty) joins the new sitcom from HIMYM creators Carter and Bays, The Goodwin Games (FOX). Fellow HIMYM-recurring-guest Kal Penn is signed on for Prairie Dogs on ABC, a sitcom about a guy who takes life lessons from a con man.

So...this show? 

And with a shout-out to a dear friend who will be very, very excited by this news- Dan and Roseanne are back! It's been announced that John Goodman will join Roseanne's new show Downwardly Mobile on NBC, co-created by former Roseanne scribe Eric Gilliland.

Hopefully they will also be bringing back 90's-era giant bows. 

Thing I Hate:

The critically praised and awesomely-starring-James-Van-Der-Beek-as-himself Don't Trust the B---- in Apartment 23 will be -finally- premiering on ABC on April 11th. I've been waiting for this show since May, so I'm so excited to see that it's replacing...

Happy Endings.

Noooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!

But how will I live without Chandler, Monica, Rachel, Ross, Phoebe and Joey? 

Thing I Love:

I have mentioned NBC's Awake several times on this blog already, as evidence of how poorly the network is being run. It's a complicated premise that's both sad and confusing, and it's not going to work on network TV, etc, etc. The show premieres on March 1st, but I've seen the pilot, and it's...

Really good.

Like, really, really good. It's extremely well written, Jason Isaacs is just excellent, I was engaged for the entire hour- and honestly, that's been really hard to come by for pilots this year in general. It was a fantastic hour of television. I'd like to be proven wrong in my assumptions that people won't watch serious and well-done dramas on networks, so do me a favor and catch this one early.

Nah, you don't have to- It's NBC, they'll cancel it in a week to make room for more Whitney.

Thing I Hate:

Look, Vampire Diaries. You know I love you. I love your twisty, crazy, fast-paced energy, I love your ever-evolving romantic plot lines, I love your pretty, pretty actors. But there are times (as I've mentioned before) where you are really pushing the boundaries of my suspension of disbelief, even for a supernatural show. You can't get fingerprints from unpolished wood. You can't get an entire town of people to show up for a ball at seven when you invited them that morning. And you certainly can't show up looking like this:

Oh my god, she totally wore that to last year's Vampire Key Party Ice Cream Social!

Thing I Love/Hate:

The end of this week's How I Met Your Mother was... nerve wracking. I mean, Ted and Robin? We've been there already, and we already know she's not the mother, so...what are you doing, show?

But then I thought about it a little more, and it kinda makes sense. Ted and Robin broke up at the end of season 2, with a conversation about where they each saw themselves in five years. Well, here we are, five years later, and Ted isn't where he wanted to be. I actually think it makes perfect sense that his character would suddenly decide to want to retread old ground with her. He loved her; they didn't break up because they weren't in love, they broke up because she didn't want to get married...and now she does. I believe that his character would think that he could look past the kid thing because he wants so desperately to be done looking for "the one"- to get to his happy ending.

It obviously makes me nervous for the show, in much the same way Baby Eriksen does; these are problems that have killed sitcoms I have loved in the past. But maybe this can be the show that proves the trope wrong, you know? We got a brief flash in this episode of FutureMarshall and FutureLily, fighting over dealing with a crying baby, and it was really funny. If you can shift the tone of this show (which, by the way, is what happens to lives and friendships at these ages in reality) and keep it interesting and funny, then I am completely behind you.

I feel like the success or failure of this move, and perhaps the shift in general, will come down to how Robin handles things. I've long said that she is actually the one who is the biggest mess on the show, so truthfully I would believe several different reactions from the character, but I will need whatever happens to feel true to where she should be. After Barney, and the kid thing, and Kevin, and Barney again, and a proposal and now Ted, she should be....well, a mess.

I'm hoping that's how she handles it. And I love you, show, so you know I'm along for the ride.

As long as she's not the mother.