Wait, What Happened?

I was sick.

Like, death's door sick.

Well, not really.

But I totally went to the hospital!

So you'll forgive me for leaving you all alone, fighting your way through the TV landscape without my generous guidance. I'm so sorry, my dear Freaks, it just couldn't be helped.

The good news is that I'm back to light your way again, with the luminescence of snark! Let's take a look at what I missed during my near demise:

Summer TV is, like, so fun! 

I'd pretty much given up on Burn Notice, but after running across a repeat of one of last season's later episodes, I decided to catch up on the end so I could rejoin Mr. Westen and company when the show began its sixth season in June. I'm delighted I did - the show seems to have regained its footing, and watching Michael struggle with a believably unbeatable opponent is more engaging than the the secret keeping of the past few seasons. Plus, he's all sad because Fiona is in jail. And don't we all love a man in distress?

See, he's so upset! 

I've also been enjoying Franklin and Bash and the traditionally delightful cheesiness of ABC Family's Melissa and Joey, as well as plenty of awesome SyFy shark attacks (I'm pretty sure that Jersey Shore Shark Attack is my favorite movie of all time.) I'm excited for the return of White Collar this week, not in the least because Matt Bomer seems to be sporting a little salt-and-pepper with his more gruff island-cast-away look, as well as Leverage on July 15th.

Yeah, because you ever need to look in a mirror...

Let's Talk (Really Quickly and With Big Words) About Newsroom

People seem to be hating on Newsroom. Like, a lot.

They're complaining about the speechifying; the Ross-and-Rachel-they-aren't Maggie and Jim; MacKenzie the love interest who is supposed to be a badass powerful woman and is somehow just a complete spaz; the aggressively liberal politics; the overuse of all the buzzwords; the frequent musical theater references.

Really?

Because I thought I was watching an Aaron Sorkin show.

What the hell else were you expecting?

I, for one, am delighted HBO has already greenlit the show for another season, if for no other reason than how much fun Sam Waterston is having not being on Law and Order.

Little News I Find Interesting

Once Upon a Time has cast series regulars for next season to play Sleeping Beauty and Mulan.

Huh.

Disney is just the smartest marketed company ever, aren't they?

My girl crush Elizabeth Mitchell is returning to her sci-fi fans by joining the JJ Abrams helmed Revolution this fall.

Sigh.

Damn it, now I have to hope that show is good. 

Charlie Sheen's new show Anger Management premiered to the largest audience ever for an FX show.

And then lost 38% of its audience the following week.

Ha, ha. (Because the show is terrible.)

Also, TNT renewed Dallas for a second season.

Personally, I'm hoping for a Christmas special.....

Clearly, the deal he made with the devil to still be alive did not include looking like it...

Anything else I missed, Freaks? Head to the comments and let me know!